I have a few things to put out.
1) I will be on this site more often, and may even post more regularly.
2) I will no longer talk about work. At all.
3) my business email is kyle.elsasser@navy.mil. feel free to drop a line, I'll return it.
4) I have decided I get off my ass and commence work on my first book, officially. I will post my sectioned manuscripts as I create them for you all to judge and criticize.
5) How's everyone been? It's been awhile. I've had two nervous breakdown in the last three years, started smoking, stopped smoking, and started again, am studying hard at become a mid-grade alcoholic, I've discover $2 PBR draft at Beer Light Tavern is my Kryptonite despite the horrible gut rot I get from it, and I plan to get an '09 Camaro SS so Megan Fox will come willingly because I find kidnapping less than romantic. I've finally discerned a sense of style, but am out of practice at manwhoring (I was pretty good for a while), have been to Brest, France (where you never get to see any), the North Pole (where Santa's Security tried to capture me thinking I was an escaped worker elf), and Panama City, Panama (where the sight of an upturned burning husk of a car, a shirtless man on a porch with an AK-47, and a cop trying to not be seen in his cop car and visibly shaking are normal, acceptable sights). I hate every aspect of my job and daily hope to be hit by a speeding fatman on a moped on my way out of work so that I may die in a way as humiliating as I am living.
Oh, and I drink copious amounts of coffee and energy to keep myself alive, as I continuously find myself narcaleptic whenever it's really important to my health and paycheck to be alert. I'm a bit more of a smartass, have reached the brink of looney tunes and decided the music is catchy so I'll hang out for a while, and have successfully stuck to a difficult regiment of telling myself I'm going to work out daily.
For more personal info:
I'm still 5'6"
I now weigh ~150 lbs vice the 130lbs I was out of high school
I like my hair at the Navy regulation limit, so I can wave it about in slow motion
My signature says "Bon Jovi" instead of "K(violentstreakingdoctorlinesandsomethingthatvaguelylookslikealightningbolt)"
My capital T's look like a 7 with erectile dysfunction
I want to go to school to become a Physician's Assistant, maybe one day a Physician (but not a Surgeon, don't wanna get woozy at the table)
I like to read, write, and play obnoxiously difficult puzzle games (See: Evidence)
I can only grow facial hair under my chin, in two perfect rectangles with a 1/4" bald space seperating them.
I wear a 9-9 1/2 vice 11s (still don't understand how that happened)
I'm reading the H. Potter series in normal order, but watching the movies in reverse order.
And Ryan Reynolds is my celebrity hero.
Kyle "Bon Jovi" Elsasser, Valkyrie.